Confectionary Comforts

Running my fingertip along the wrinkled peak of thin, gold foil, I find an edge. I insert a nail under the delicate lip and lift the sheet, hearing it crinkle as it expands like an accordion. I pause a moment, just long enough to pinch the end of the tiny paper strip, and tug it free from its host.

Satisfied that the sheath has been removed intact, I crumple the shiny square of foil and paper strip into a ball, and discard it. Popping the freed morsel into my mouth, I let it sit on my tongue for a few seconds, and feel my body’s heat react with the sugary drop. As it melts, a fragment of almond is revealed. In a sudden movement of tongue and teeth, I swipe the nut between my molars and feel it crack under pressure.

As I swallow the delicious mixture, my fingers search the bag for my next Hershey Kiss with Almonds. . . .

More than I should, I find myself reaching for chocolate. One might think the rich texture and undeniably delicious flavor of this popular confection tempts me, but I have a different motivation for eating chocolate.

Like a baby, I crave something soothing and repetitive when I’m stressed, tired or bored. Since Gerber doesn’t make pacifiers for 44-year-olds, and my husband isn’t inclined to rock me in a rocking chair, I opt for sweet treats.

I’m not talking about gorging on devil’s food cake, or slurping up Hot Fudge Brownie Delights. While I have been known to indulge in those delicacies from time to time, I find more comfort in chocolate treats that lend themselves to a prolonged ritualistic enjoyment of the process of eating chocolate.

We’re about to uproot our lives here on this US Army base in Stuttgart, Germany, and move back across the Atlantic to Mayport Naval Station in Florida.

Stressing over the logistics of this particularly complicated move has caused a flare up in my need for comfort, and as such, I’ve been hitting the chocolate pretty hard. Hershey Kisses with Almonds have been my recent remedy of choice, mostly because eating each tiny morsel involves several repetitive steps that I find quite soothing.

When I can’t get my hands on those, I turn to other chocolaty treats for my therapy. Most recently, I have eased my stress with Girl Scout’s Thin Mints Cookies. Regardless of the nutrition label, an entire sleeve of these delectable disks is really needed to calm the nerves.

Extracting a cookie from the top of the stack, I place it on my tongue and allow it to steep. The chocolate coating slowly melts, and then my saliva soaks into the crisp center, dissolving it into a mouthful of minty mush. I chew any remaining crunchy bits and swallow, as I lift another disk from the sleeve. 

Usually, one sleeve will do the trick, but on particularly stressful nights, I’ve been tempted to take the second sleeve from the box. I resist this urge, knowing that the guilt of eating so many Girl Scout Cookies will only add to my stress and thereby increase my need for confectionary comforts.

Even as a child, I remember ritualizing my consumption of treats. I never understood a kid who could take a bag of M&Ms, tear open the top, and pour the whole thing into his upturned mouth. What a waste!

I, on the other hand, would maximize my enjoyment, spreading the contents of each bag out, and separating the candies out into their colors (which were, back then, orange, green, yellow, dark brown and light brown.) I would then analyze each pile, eating only the most flawed morsels. Those that were misshapen or had an imperfect “M” were goners. I continued this process until I had whittled the lot down to one of each color. Those five, the Chosen Ones, would be scooped up together and ceremoniously sacrificed in one final chomp.

This may all sound nuts, but in times of stress, everyone turns to something for relief, and I figure that three-quarters of a bag of Hershey Kisses with Almonds is measurably better for one’s mental and physical health than three packs of Camels and a pint of Jose Quervo.

So why not dissect a dozen peanut butter cups, nibble the chocolate off the nougat center of a Three Musketeers Bar, or methodically pick apart a pair of Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls? It tastes good, it feels good, and stress melts away as fast as a chocolate Kiss on your tongue.

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Comments: 7

  1. susanna May 26, 2011 at 1:52 am Reply

    first and foremost: Congrats on #1, numero uno in the top 25 military family blogs!!!
    Hope you stop by and fill in the blanks about Mayport, once you get settled.
    Good luck on your move!

  2. Maz May 25, 2011 at 5:26 pm Reply

    OK, this will REALLY scare you!
    I sat down to watch Hines Ward in the “Dancing…” finale with a bagful of mini Snickers. I slowly unwrapped the mini morsel…popped it in…sucked the chocolate off the caramel…then sucked the CARAMEL OFF THE PEANUTS!
    With only a mouthful of peanuts left, I actually told myself that I was crunching a HEALTHY snack and ate one right after the other.
    What’s wrong with us?

    • Lisa Smith Molinari May 25, 2011 at 10:45 pm Reply

      I understand completely, Maz, and will try your method this weekend!

  3. Patrice May 23, 2011 at 9:20 pm Reply

    I was looking for the description of you eating a box of thin mints… one else I know eats all of the chocolate off the outside before exposing the gooey mint paste!….or maybe a desription of eating a Goetz’s!

    • Lisa Smith Molinari May 24, 2011 at 6:31 am Reply

      You are revealing all my OCD rituals, Patrice! I forgot about the Goetz’s — now my mouth is watering!

  4. Sharon May 23, 2011 at 2:02 pm Reply

    Yummmmmmmy! Great job, Lisa. You clearly expressed the sensual pleasure of eating chocolate. I have similar rituals. Hint: get the dark chocolate kisses, they’re good for your heart.

    • Lisa Smith Molinari May 24, 2011 at 6:30 am Reply

      Thanks for the “health” tip, Sharon — maybe I’ll try a few dozen tonight!

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