I get up early in the mornin’, round about six-o-clock. Bleary-eyed and yawnin’, I gather up the flock. Pack three chillins in the van, and drive around the block. At the neighbor’s crib, two more are added to my stock. Coffee cup in hand, I head for open road. My minivan creaks under such a…
housewives
The Skittles-Space Continuum
“Where are the tickets?” I said with a half-panicked gasp. The line was moving steadily ahead, and we were almost at the admissions booth. My husband searched his wallet, while I frantically fondled my video camera case; my pockets full of gum, tissues, and Dramamine for motion sickness; and my backpack stuffed with water bottles,…
The Time Has Come
“Is it time?” I thought to myself as I sipped my coffee and stared at our lifeless Christmas tree. I could flip the switch to electrify the tiny lights, top off the stagnant water in the stand, and blur my eyes to the curling branches and falling needles for one more week. Or, I could…
The Office Holiday Party
Four steps into the entrance of the downtown Hyatt, my feet started to hurt and I noticed a small run in my pantyhose. I took a deep breath, which was somewhat difficult considering I had bound my midsection with no less than four layers of figure-enhancing spandex, and tried to channel a festive attitude toward…
What I believe about Hell and hand baskets