Cue organ music. Distinguished male voice over: “In our last episode, publishing mogul Preston Thornton III was still in a coma as a result of the mysterious chandelier accident at his Bay City Mansion. His evil twin sister Iris hatched a deal with Metropolitan Hospital’s Dr. Lucas Moore to keep Preston unconscious until they had…
Humor
The Morning After
Reluctantly, an eyelid peels open and groggily squints at the blurred morning. I try to swallow, but can only smack my lips dryly. Confused at first, my sluggish brain begins to recollect the events of the previous day. Oh yea, Christmas. Finding my other slipper wedged under the sleeping dog, I shuffle my way…
Holiday Party Survival Guide
Just when you think you’ve finally used up all the leftover turkey . . . just when you store your pilgrim salt and pepper shakers back in the basement . . . just when you emerge from your tryptophan-induced semi-coma and stop to take a breather . . . WHAM! The winter holiday season…
My husband, in the bathroom, with the razor
Recently, while scraping the toothpaste plops out of our bathroom sink in anticipation of holiday guests, I had an epiphany. Law enforcement agencies desperately need my expertise. While it is true that our ever-mobile military lifestyle has made it nearly impossible for me to pursue a career outside of the home in my 20 years…
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What I believe about Hell and hand baskets