“We’re going skiing this weekend,” I tell anyone who will listen. As the words part my lips, I hope the listeners envision my family clad in all the latest sportswear slicing effortlessly between snowy mountain moguls. Little do they know, my family does not own a pair of skis. My husband thinks skiing is a…
Pets
The Morning After
Reluctantly, an eyelid peels open and groggily squints at the blurred morning. I try to swallow, but can only smack my lips together dryly. Confused at first, my sluggish brain begins to recollect the events of the previous day. Oh yea, Christmas. Finding my other slipper sock wedged between the sleeping dog and the bathtub,…
A Time for Hope, Cheer, and Ruthless Criminal Behavior
During this season of giving, people everywhere are transformed. The Spirit of Christmas inspires generosity, compassion and joy in us all. But sometimes, in the midst of all this merriment, mania causes our personalities to swing wildly in the other direction, resulting in violence, theft, and intentional infliction of emotional distress. What, pray tell, could…
Ow, Christmas Tree!
My hands look like they’ve been hit by shrapnel. The Persian rug is imbedded with sawdust, pine needles and sticky spots of sap. The trunk of our Christmas tree, which can be clearly seen through the sparse branches, is warped in the middle. That’s what I get for telling my husband to pick out the…
What I believe about Hell and hand baskets