Is there life after terminal leave? Keep on dreaming…

dream cartoon

Ever since my retired Navy husband, Francis, went on terminal leave, I’ve been having some pretty weird dreams.

Nowadays, some prefer to use the label “transition leave” because it sounds a little less like someone is about to die, but no matter whether one uses the ominous traditional term or the newfangled sugarcoated expression, both describe the same thing: the period of accrued leave (up to 75 days) that a serviceperson can take before his or her final separation from the military.

Some lucky military servicepersons line up good civilian jobs before their leave time begins, making leave a veritable vacation. Others sail through their leave without a care in the world knowing they can survive comfortably on their military retirement pay due to independent wealth, or a spouse with a wicked good job, or an absence of major bills like mortgages and college tuition.

But then there are people like us.

We have a dog scheduled for expensive knee surgery, two kids with private college tuition, one child who goes over the data limit on her phone every month, a minivan with 180,000 miles on it and a funny rattling noise in the wheel well, tired old furniture in desperate need of replacement, and an embarrassing amount of accumulated debt.

I could claim that my writing career will carry us, but then again, I could also declare that monkeys will fly out of my belly-button. So, it’s a given: Francis has to get a new job before his terminal leave ends and he stops receiving a paycheck from Uncle Sam.

During this transition in our lives, we could either fight the psychosomatic effects of stress, or embrace them. Did you know that nail biting actually saves wear and tear on clippers? Facial ticks are a form of exercise. Wine actually tastes pretty good on Tuesday afternoons. Diarrhea can be quite cleansing. And terminal leave nightmares are kind of fun to interpret.

In this week’s nightmare, I had a big, sprawling house with lots of rooms. And even though it was my house, I was surprised by several hidden hallways, staircases and bedrooms. At some point, I became aware that I had houseguests. Dozens of them. The house suddenly looked cluttered and dirty. The dream turned chaotic, as I tried desperately to play hostess the hoard of guests. I was frantic to find them all clean towels, bedrooms and baths in the complicated maze of my mysterious house. Just before I woke up, I discovered that the bathrooms were infested with gobs and gobs of slimy black mold.

I couldn’t wait to ask Google what my bizarre nightmare was all about.

Apparently, “new room” dreams are actually quite common. According to www.DreamMoods.com and most other online dream interpretation sources, a house represents “self” or “inner psyche,” and finding new rooms in that house can indicate that the dreamer is facing something new or unknown about himself or herself. Finding dirty or cluttered rooms implies that some aspect of the dreamer’s life is in chaos. It can also mean that the dreamer is suffering from some emotional or psychological clutter, and needs to release these feelings in order to regain control.

What other common dreams may appear during stressful transitions in life?

Teeth falling out can indicate problems with confidence or self-expression. Being late to, or forgetting to study for, a school exam implies that the dreamer feels judged or unprepared for a challenge. Dreams of falling happen when one feels unsupported or out-of-control, but are also linked to a “fall from grace.” Dreams of being naked in public can indicate shame, fear of exposure, and vulnerability. Being chased in a dream can represent fear that a secret, an addiction, or a debt may catch up with you. Dreaming of being in an out-of-control vehicle can indicate a lack of direction in life.

But interestingly, flying often indicates that the dreamer is feeling empowered and optimistic.

So, for those who have recently retired from the military or are considering retirement, never fear. Even if you find yourself toothless on a date, naked in church, late for a Calculus exam, or being chased by wolverines, remember that it’s only a dream. One day soon terminal leave will be over, and with any luck, you’ll be flying high.

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Comments

  1. Thank you for sharing your dreams and situations. I have confidence that the two of you will continue to fly through life, exploring the “rooms” of your new experiences.

  2. Lisa…I love your raw honesty and your talent to so descriptively personify life’s nuances! I love the descriptions of the psychological effects of stress (hey! I resemble that comment!). Despite your stressing I can’t wait to see where your life leads next! With Francis by your side it will be one hell of a ride!

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